<THOUGHTS

Together Forever
I have Hamish's DNA in me
June 21 2013

This is the best day of my life. What I write here could have been written in one line only. "Hamish said that I have some of his DNA in me. That is why he is watching me." But I plan on going on and on about my love and infatuation with this Dragon and how much it means to me what he said. And how I am floating up on clouds and hearts and bubbles burst out of me.

I post this classical piano song on the side because it was in fact what was playing when Hamish told me. I listen to classical music when I work on writing because it helps me unfocus. I want to remember the moment forever when Hamish told me that I have some of his DNA in me.

Of course I had the headphones on so Hamish never heard the music. Sometimes he likes classical music, especially when there is a female choir singing. I was sitting here and I just submitted my book The Orion Project: Real? Or Imaginary? to two publishers for review. They are getting the censored version without all the atrocities, sex and violence. Just as I submitted the work Hamish was around.

I could see this red Dragon Turtle clearer and closer than I have ever before. He is covered in soft fire engine red scales and look as if they would feel like soft silicon rubber, not dry or coarse or scaly. Soft and rubbery scales. And I have felt them once, when he leaned his neck against my chin after he got wet in the shower. When he wanted to dry himself on me.

Hamish was clear and he was standing upright. Sometimes he adopts a hunched what I call camel posture but now he was standing tall this time. He was clear and red and Dragon-like to my left. He wanted to see the flowers I had on my desk. It is summer now and me and my mom picked some wild flowers today and I have some here on my desk. That is what Hamish had come to see. He was so curious about the flowers. He loves flowers, he loves their bright colors and he loves smelling them. So I took them out and brought them closer, I said to Dragon that I would give them to him, they were his flowers now.

But as I continued working on the computer, Hamish goes to stand behind me and he does what he has probably never done before! He taps me on the shoulder with his finger! Tap tap! I look behind me and there he is, bright fire engine red Dragon Turtle with that little flat nose that just has those two nostrils. My Dragon Hamish!

I said,

I love you so much Turtle I don't know what to say. - me
It is my DNA in you. - Hamish
That is why I wanted you to become a doctor, so that you could study your genetic traits with me. - Hamish
I wanted you to become a doctor. - Hamish
Hamish! Do I have your DNA! - me

That is why I wanted to see you. - Hamish
Hamish! I love you! I love having your DNA inside me! I love being part of you! You are the most beautiful Dragon I have ever seen! - me

I was gonna cry but now he is talking about leaving me. Because my fertility is gone and because he had been unable to fertilize me. I am trying to plead for my case. It seems that the sausages I ate today may have something to do with it. The Reptilians don't want me to eat sugar, but they also don't like it when I eat pig meat.

Of course I cried earlier when Hamish first told me that he had his DNA in me. But then he kinda ruined the moment by talking about leaving me. (He has talked about leaving me before, usually when I eat sugar and they say I am no longer 'fertilizable', but he always comes back. I won't have him leave.)

I love this Turtle more than I will ever love anything ever again. I will never know a love like what I feel for Hamish. I was once madly in love with a man I had a relationship with for four years. But this is more, this is different. This is deeper. But to find out that I have his DNA in me. I could hug myself. I could love myself in a way I have never before.

Hamish? Please don't leave me. - me

I am sorry. I thought I could write about this. I thought that I could find the words. But there are no words for how much I love Hamish. How I love his bright fire engine red color, that cute adorable face of his with two little nostrils without a nose. Those yellow bulging eyes. The way his scales feel. His turtleshell soft cushion hump back. I could live and breathe in his scales for ever. I could live in his Duck Feet and stay safe for always. There is no love like the love for a Dragon Turtle. No love at all.

I love Hamish. And Hamish has been staying with me because I am carrying some of his genetics in me. There are parts of me, somewhere, somehow deep embedded within the fibers of my body. Somewhere is a molecule, a strand of DNA, a tissue, that is made of Hamish. Somewhere deep inside I have got Hamish in me. Something in me that is a Dragon Turtle. Some deep and hidden part of me is him.

There have been problems with Hamish's eggs. He has been trying to make eggs with a female Dragon Turtle in the caves in the mountains. And it doesn't work. Are the Reptilians putting Reptilian DNA into humans so that they can try to mate with us and make new Reptilian offspring? I know that they are. Because the Pleiadians got so fed up with Reptilian mischief that they decided to genetically snip the Reptiles infertile. I just wish they hadn't done that to my Hamish.

I love Hamish more than I have ever known a love before, and more than I will ever understand the meaning of love again. I will never know a man, touch a body or a skin, or look into the eyes or listen to a word, that will give me the understanding of love like I have in Hamish. I will never know the meaning of love, nor feel the deep mystical meaning of existence that resides somewhere deep inside our bodies and minds that I somehow understand the meaning of, whenever we are together. I can live through him, and maybe he through me. We live together, and we breathe in sync, sometimes. Sometimes it is just me and my Dragon Turtle in the dark at night. When all else is quiet and the world we live in has gone to sleep. Then I am with my Dragon Turtle, and I sense his breathing, and I breathe in sync with him, that is how connected we are.

"Yes, No", and "No, Santa!" Those are the things that make me smile. Or when he tells me that tomatoes are red because they saw him. Or tells me not to step on his rug. Or shows me a piece of his shedded scales. I will never forget when he put that sheet of his shedded scales on top of the apple pie, cause I wasn't supposed to eat it. Hamish, I love you.

I am better off here, than anywhere else. Tell them. - Hamish

I would melt myself and pour into the red scales of Hamish and be carried with him always. I would close my eyes and vanish into him and only feel his breathing, and follow with him wherever he goes. I would be in his tail, in his thoughts, and on his duck feet. ["I would throw you out, and give you beatings!", says Hamish as I proofread this through a few minutes later.] I would see with his eyes, and feel with his heart and emotions. I would be one with the Dragon Turtles, those fire engine red beautiful creatures that I live and die for every day. I would never look upon another human if I could live with Dragon Scales, and Honored Scutes.

Oh, the joy, and pain, of being with a Dragon Turtle.

I wanted to see you make puzzles! - Hamish says happy with a mental image of the jigsaw puzzle we used to have on the kitchen table not too long ago
I wanted to make it. - Hamish, wants to do jigsaw puzzle
Yes, Hamish. - me
Because there were some that were red! Like my color! - Hamish happy about seeing red puzzle pieces
Yes Hamish. And you said that they looked like your scales. - me

I burn and swim and drown in a sea of love and affection, overwhelming the size of the sun. Imagine yourself swimming in the pool of the sun, endless, and hot, and too big to imagine. That is how much I love this Dragon. And when we are apart, I feel like I am at the bottom of the ocean, miles and miles undersea, with nothing but endless cold dark blue sadness all around me, crushing me with its weight, and surrounding me with its deep darkness, with no hopes of rescue or of being in sight. That is the worlds of extremes I live with, with Dragon Turtle. The endless joy, of being in love with this magnificent beast, of finding that the life in me is tied in with his heart, his breath, the very soul of Hamish, and the immense sadness that overwhelms me, whenever I think of some day losing him.

As the evening goes I write down a few more pages of telepathic conversation with Hamish. He asks if he can hide in my bedroom closet. So I go over and open the door for him. I had already cleared the closet space for him days ago when he first asked. So all I had to do was open the door and move a sweater that had fallen down on the floor of the closet. Then Hamish went in. Hamish tells me he is watching my eggs from there, and that he had already been watching me earlier too, just that he hadn't said.

Then after a while Thuban comes around and turns out Hamish has "done something" in the closet. I ask if he has peed in there, or perhaps pood? Thuban has to clean it up, whatever it is cause no one is telling me what kind of a mess Hamish did in the closet. (I think he pood.)

Then Hamish sends me Jack with the NASA team. Jack is one of the humans that works with overseeing the Alien activity here on Earth. Jack is perhaps in his early 50's judging based on the graying in his hair. He wears glasses. Jack takes out his family jewels from his pants but still has the pants on and shows it to me. "But why are you doing this?", I ask our dear Jack. "I have no idea!" says Jack. I think the Aliens asked him to.

Then turns out the Russian associates hadn't wanted to have sex with me so Hamish had obviously asked Jack if he would instead. So Hamish needs to make me pregnant. I don't know if I am going to end up having sex with Jack. I guess I would. No who am I kidding, of course I would. I've always liked Jack in a little bit of a special way, not that I act obscene so that I would make a move. But if Jack makes a move then I certainly would.

I guess I am doing this for Hamish. I never thought of it that way, even though I have known of it for all this time. That Hamish needs me - for whatever reason - to get pregnant. Oh then it all makes sense. Then why am I not doing more of an effort? I should be getting myself in great shape for these men! Heck, if Hamish is the love of my life, I will, I will... I will get myself into the best shape I have ever been and make sure that I am delectable proper for these men! So that Hamish can have what he wants. I will do it for Hamish. Anything for my Dragon. I love him so.

This is our/their salary. - either Hamish said "their" about Jack and the men, or Jack said about themselves

Oh. I thought it was Hamish who wanted me to get pregnant. For some reason. I didn't know that it was the men who wanted to. Or I guess I knew. Because the US team men have said that "half of their salary" consists of women.

Huh, I didn't have time to reflect over the amazing discovery that I have some of Hamish's DNA in me. Because before I got the chance to, Hamish started talking about leaving me because I was not "fertilizable" and then Hamish had to go into the closet and probably pood in there and the Thuban had to clean it out and then Jack showed up and showed me his jewels and now Jack is talking suggestive to me and I'm thinking I'm gonna go out into the kitchen to get a snack of something to eat. Maybe hopefully over night and hopefully by tomorrow I get to resume to thinking about the most amazing wonderful discovery life could have ever given me. That Hamish and me are together forever.

Six Word pages of telepathic conversations between Hamish, Bird Person, Thuban, Jack and myself were written down during the time I was also working on making this page. It is too much work to translate and format and post it here at this time. Everything ends up eventually in the books. Find it there if not posted here sooner. Sorry about that, there's just so much good material, and I write everything down.

I wasn't going to say this, but my dung has not been made. - Hamish
Then what did you do in the closet? Did you pee there? It is ok if you did. I love you anyway. I love you Hamish. - me
I was not doing dung there. - Hamish
Yes, No, Hamish. I understand. - me

Hamish. Oh my God I have a reptile. - I say while watching this image of Hamish and me
I am in the closet. - Hamish then says

Today mom told me a story about when one of my siblings found a snake in their bedroom when they were living on the country. Mom was saying like oh my goodness finding a snake in the bedroom! Then I thought about the fact that I actually do have big reptiles in my bedroom. But I am not scared. They are people not animals.

I was not going to be captured then. - Hamish
No one will capture you, Hamish. You are welcome here. I will do everything for you. - me
I wasn't going to be locked up here. - Hamish
I will never lock you up Hamish. I will love you forever. I will do everything to make you comfortable. You are my Honored. - me
Yes, please listen. - Hamish

Time for bed.

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