<THOUGHTS

Hospital
November 30 2014

Zeta takes me to a hospital, I think. Filled with human doctors, I think.

Spaceship Cylinder

I woke up in the morning hours, maybe it was 7 or 8 AM this morning. It being Sunday morning, I wanted to linger on in the comfortable bed even if I was already fully rested and hard to even keep my eyes closed. The Black Reptilian showed me again in a mental image the large vertical cylinder that is a main component of their spacecraft engine. He told me how energy is amassed at other components right above the cylinder, this energy then spirals down to the cylinder, causing the cylinder to rotate. This rotation, since the cylinder is attached fixed to the rest of the spacecraft, causes the entire spacecraft to rotate. This rotation in turn produces gravity within the spacecraft. I am a total science and physics nut so this was fantastic, I was also surprised that he was giving away free these fantastic engineering secrets to me like he was.

Hamish wants some Christmas presents

Hamish thought about the Christmas tree, he is getting anxious to see the tree soon. We don't have it up yet, and he is ready and waiting. He knows where on the living room floor it will be, and he is expecting wrapped Christmas presents under it in red paper, and he says he will "take them". I ask Dragon if he wants Christmas presents from me this year, and I get him to tell me what should be in those presents of his, which he thinks he would drag over to the bathroom ruggie in the bathroom, somewhat like a cat drags a mouse to a doorstep, he wants "yellow flowers", and "childrens' toys". The yellow flowers would be actual yellow flowers from the botanist shop, and the childrens' toys are baby chew toys, which Dragon says he would get to take and break apart, because he is never allowed to take such toys from the hybrid children, so he wants some that are all of his own. I think I can do that for Dragon.

Roasting meat

The Black Reptilian

Hey, hello, this is Captain Marsden. - Captain Marsen telepathically now, interrupts me as I'm about to write the story about roasting meat
.. Hello Captain Marsden. - me, I've loved and cared for this man since I was 14-15, he was the team leader of my MILABS MKULTRA team and he was always memorably nice to me
It's good to hear you again! Hey Captain Marsden! How have you been all these years! - me
Yeah, this woman talks to me like I am her, like she is my daughter. - CM to others
.. You were always nice to me. I remember that. - me, now thinking that maybe he is just like the rest of them
So. What are you doing lately? Did you retire? - me
Well, I was going to tell you something. - CM
Nothing you don't mind, with those incubators at least. - Zeta adds, meaning hybrid babies
I don't care about hybrids! I want to see Hamish! I don't want this anymore! - me in a sudden rage that even surprised me

So. Black Reptilian in the morning hours showed me a vivid clear mental image of roasting big juicy cubes of meat, it even conveyed the delicious smell of fatty meat on the grill, smoke rising from the roast, cubes of meat pierced in a row on grill sticks, and several of those sticks too. I knew it was human or hybrid flesh. I hate to say it it smelled tasty, unlike any animal meats we have, maybe a bit like pork but with a nicer sweeter smell to it. My brain registered the sight and smell as food and I was salivating. I'm not trying to be gross or offensive here, I'm just documenting the fact that I was shown roasting human or hybrid flesh, and my actual honest reaction to it is part of the facts. If I start omitting, or perhaps skewing facts, then what kind of a documentary is this?!! So, let me tell you how it was, and what happened.

But I'm a vegetarian, thankfully. Cause it makes a much stronger rejection, when I told them "no thanks I won't eat any, I am a vegetarian I don't eat any meat", than to just say, "no thanks I don't like that particular kind of meat but other meats will do".

Zeta doctor takes me to a hospital

So, was it difficult being there? - Captain Marsden asks me, somewhat concernedly
It was ok. In fact I want to go back. - me
That is what we wanted to talk to you about. - Zeta to CM
Yeah.. - CM somewhat concerned
Can I go back? And can I meet you there? - me, what? Captain Marsden is crying silently
Captain Marsden, don't cry. Everything is ok? - me, and then I think of the roasting meat skewers

So. Anyhow. I was still in bed with all of this, and a Zeta presents the illusion of putting up his doctor's bag, like a dark briefcase, up on my bed, and he tells me he is a "doctor", he might have even said that he is a "butt doctor" cause they always say that I hear it often (I think it sounds more funny than scary, ridiculous even). Supposedly like he is some doctor who is paying a visit and has a briefcase with various instruments coming here next to me on my bed.

I fell asleep and wow bam I have a perfectly lucid dream! It is the brightest realest place! "Can you see where you are?", the aliens ask me. Yes! I am in the Arctic wilderness! Big dark mountains with dark grey and patches of snow, snow and ice on the ground. Far, far away, up on a hill, I faintly distinguish two characters waving with their mittened hands. Are those aliens, or humans, I wonder, and somehow I'm expecting them to be aliens. The black reptilian has his "flying saucer" style spacecraft nearby, and there is a lit grill with those roasting skewers of human or hybrid meat, just like he had shown me just earlier. This time, since I am this much closer to that barbeque, it is more uncomfortable, because my worry is that they might want to make me eat it. I turned vegetarian just a few days ago more seriously and I worried that the aliens thought I have some nutrient deficiencies and trying to give me 'real food', just a thought that went through my mind.

Two children, a boy and a girl

We knew you weren't hungry for it. - Dark Lord

A hybrid boy and girl are running from a door opening in an adjacent building, straight out into the snow, then they catch each other like a game of tag, and run back in through the door again, only to run back out, and in, they are running back and forwards, playing tag it seems, right next to the smouldering barbeque which they pay no attention to. The kids are wearing winter clothes. I go to the door opening to intercept and catch them

I wanted to catch them too. Where were they? - Hamish, my thinking and writing of this "catching" has now triggered his hunting instinct, as we all know Hamish likes to catch things
Well, Hamish, I am describing what is either a dream or an alien encounter. - me
It was both, actually. - Zeta
We make you mesmerized with our eyes. - Thuban or Zeta

But when I caught the kids in the building, they turned out to just be three ragdolls on the floor there. I had intended to catch them, and I had said that I was going to rescue them and take these kids out of here. Of course I was assuming that they were the roast, but now I picked up what was only a ragdoll, and two other dolls there on the floor. I was in a dark small building.

NOW gets the interesting part, that isn't dreamesque. The previous in the Arctic has what I believe to be elements from real alien contact however blended with dream, as I was asleep at this time. But NOW wait till you hear what happened.

I ventured deeper into this dark building and bam I was in a real hospital. Perfectly clear and realistic, and I was perfectly awake and to my senses. It was the real me, in a real place, in a hospital. Was it a lucid dream or was it based on an actual alien abduction? I was in the hallway. The walls were white

We were with professionals, there. - speaks an alien to me telepathically, about this hospital I dreamt of
What, where was that hospital? Was it a real place? And who was eating "meat"? - me

The hospital had many small examination or procedure rooms along the hallway, then there would

The Santinians say you weren't examined there, you were raped. - Santinian
What did they do to me there? - me
Hey, this is Captain Marsden! We don't want to tell! - CM is crying and his face covered in tears his voice is pained, he says this to the Santinian
What is going on? I don't understand! - me

Yeah, we do this to all the advanced Starchildren. - someone says, while I'm drawing my map, meaning I'm an advanced Starchild, and that we are all taken to the hospital I am drawing

Yes we have to. It is part of the battleplan. - Black Reptilian adds after one minute

So here is a map of the hospital layout I was in, much easier to draw than to explain in words. I started out at the door which I labled "exit to the outdoors". The red line traces fairly accurately how I walked across the hallways. I had gone to sleep wearing only my panties but luckily I wasn't walking around naked, I seemed to be wearing some white clothes. The hospital had many small examination or procedure rooms lined up. The doors were all open to the small rooms.

In the room titled "Asian man" I looked in and there was a young Asian man with a bare upper body unless completely naked, he was probably sitting on a chair, he was the patient. The doctor stood or sat in front of him right against him close so that they were touching body against body. The doctor held, unless this was held against the Asian man by some device such as a stand, a metal bowl contraption. The bowl was shiny metal and curved, the curve in the bowl enabled it to be placed right under his chin and firmly against his chest so that the bowl wrapped around shoulder to shoulder, presumably to catch any liquids coming from the mouth. Some procedure was being done to him, I thought it looked hideously scary and I moved on, my eyes were big wide open this was such a creepy place.

What made an impression on me was the density of doctors and medical staff. I didn't see nurses or orderlies, only people who made an impression of being highly educated, smart, and higher level like doctors or surgeons, and there were so many of them I thought! Many in the hallways, in the rooms. Some doctors had white doctor uniforms, and some had green surgeon clothes, men and women I think, but mostly men. Human doctors.

It was a very creepy place. Not like your home town's sleepy doctor's office. This place felt like "medical procedures", it was such a scary atmosphere, my instincts picked up something uncomfortable. It didn't feel dangerous, I must say, just creepy. And I'm not normally intimidated by hospital settings at all.

I was looking for a way out, it didn't take me many seconds of being perfectly awake in a real hospital to decide for myself that I wanted to look for the way out of this place. I was walking at a fast pace, but not running. So I walked past those exam rooms (the top row on the map), then I turned back probably because of the doctor standing up ahead. Small short hallways led across to another longer hallway, as you see with there being small offices or rooms in between in that "middle row".

I went back toward the door that I saw led outdoors but I didn't try to open it because I looked up at the ceiling for lit up Exit signs and found them! So I followed the Exit signs, I was sure they would lead me to safety and quick!

It was scary and exciting, I felt like I was escaping. The doctors whom I met in the hallway they looked at me but didn't try to grab or stop me. In the "lower" hallway I saw that the hospital extends in that direction, then I saw the exit sign which led me through a door to the stairwell with stairs leading upstairs, maybe downstairs too, but I opted not for the stairs because I was hoping for a front entrance exit door, so I went back through that stairwell door and the other way in this "lower" hallway.

A doctor, human man with brown hair and white doctor clothes and labcoat stopped as he saw me, he looked me right in the eye and I into his, I continued along that hallway, I think straight ahead was a reception desk so I could ask for the way out.

Then there was a white pause, then I was naked on my belly on a brown padded medical bench table, I thought I was in a larger medical room which I titled "Reception and/or Exam Room" because it felt as if it was in that direction where I was headed toward what I thought could have been a reception counter built in to the wall up ahead.

I was specifically told in spoken English language that I should relax, I think what he said was that I should relax so that it is easier. I was scared cause I was worrying a rectal procedure. The aliens collect fecal samples it seems every night, they are studying my food and metabolism, and so I tensed up my whole body and curled together because of the worry, so that didn't help. Luckily I woke up before I was aware of any procedure.

I was back at home in my bed. A Zeta was telling me that he would like me to drink this big glass of blue liquid which would numb my throat or esophagus, it seems they were about to put down some tubing down my esophagus, they do that it seems every night to suction vacuum up some of my stomach contents with.

And so, I don't know if that was a lucid dream or an abduction. The Santinians just told me here earlier that I really was taken and done medical things with. Captain Marsden seems to think that something has been done to me, but he won't tell me what it is. I feel confused as I don't know exactly what is happening, but I also feel excited because I think that waking up someplace else is a fantastic adventure and I had a lot of fun and hope to do it again.

Zetas were showing me mental images of their suction cup fingers in the morning when I returned. But I also overheard some things spoken by the human MILABS staff, military or hospital staff, about this being battle training.

There is a MILABS MKULTRA abductee, I forget what his name is, who is convinced that alien abductions are in reality military abductions, and that the military are disguising themselves as aliens in order to get away with it and to not be caught. Wow, as I was writing this very thing, my mind became a thick... I can't write about this topic, about the aliens being military under disguise, because something interesting happens that never happens before, I completely forget the words and concepts, and writing becomes like wading through a thick bog and then I forget things. So someone has clearly programmed my mind to forget things that are related to "the military being disguised as false aliens".

A few days ago I had an experience that night where the US military was training me to be a psychic agent so that I could remote view other nations and so that, especially since I am not a US citizen myself, the actual US military who are behind it all would never get caught, because if I were to get caught then it could never be traced back to the US military, especially because I would not know it myself that I was trained by the US military and they have blocked any connection back through my mind and to them. This was why they had asked me to survey Russian satellites, missile bases, and submarines.

Let me try this again, that was very fascinating, how I discovered a thick cloud of memory loss over the concept of "disguise". My mind does something very peculiar when I was trying to write about the hypothesis that US military disguises themselves as aliens.

So, are they aliens abducting people? Are they military abducting people? Or are they, as my own theory is at the moment, aliens and military working together, where the aliens get their hybrid babies

And me/we get food to eat! - Hamish

And Hamish gets food to eat, and military get to do whatever. That's right, Hamish. The aliens have to be real, because we have Hamish. Hamish couldn't possibly be a fake mirage created by the military. Think. The first time I ever met Hamish was during the mind control hypnosis by the Free Mason. But Hamish has to be real! Sometimes Hamish morphs into Captain Robert Stephens. A green lizard once morphed into John Kerry. Oh this is so frustrating!

This morning when I returned, I had an interesting experience, namely I started to see the figure of a Zeta, but the image was for some reason not realistic to me. I thought that its head was far too big to make sense, and I even thought that what if the human doctors had planted me with a false image of a Zeta head, because this head I was seeing wasn't biologically plausible somehow and I kept thinking "yeah right, you're not fooling me, it's fake". So, is it fake? Or are the humans fake? Hello I want to know! But someone is abducting me, and I can't wait to find out the truth behind this.

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